BOY: Hey babe, I think it’s time we take a step further.
GIRL takes one step forward.
BOY: You are not supposed to take it literally. It was meant to be taken figuratively. But never mind, let’s not ruin the mood.
Anyway, I think we should help to improve Singapore’s declining numbers of marriages.
The property market looks rather promising. I think it’s time we co-invest in a HDB flat.
GIRL: So is this a proposal?
BOY: Erm yea,so will you marry me?
GIRL: Well, there are some things you need to know that you probably still don’t know about me. I only eat nutritious, bland food. If you make me eat junk food, fast food or anything that screams UNHEALTHY at me, I will personally send henchmen to kill you if you make me swallow anything that I deem disgusting.
And I don’t check my sms, e-mails or Facebook even though I converted many people to be a FB-user, I am personally not a FB-believer. So if you ever need to contact me, don’t! I mean you can, you can try calling my home to check if I am home first, provided my BFF is not hogging the house line trying to find out if I have been kidnapped by aliens.=D
And I will hold it personally against you, if you do anything stupid or say anything stupid about my beloved Perfectly RACY Old Folks (P.R.O.F.)
And I don’t check my sms, e-mails or Facebook even though I converted many people to be a FB-user, I am personally not a FB-believer. So if you ever need to contact me, don’t! I mean you can, you can try calling my home to check if I am home first, provided my BFF is not hogging the house line trying to find out if I have been kidnapped by aliens.=D
And I will hold it personally against you, if you do anything stupid or say anything stupid about my beloved Perfectly RACY Old Folks (P.R.O.F.)
BOY: eh
GIRL: You shuddup and listen. I hate being interrupted when I giving a lit lecture .I like tall, scrawny guys that resemble those light poles that dogs pee on, so if you ever, I MEAN EVER gains a single ounce of extra fat on you, we are totally over. Have I made myself clear?
Oh yea, and I only like guys who don’t look like authentic Asians, with those oriental looks. And I like that mole of yours.
Oh yea, and I only like guys who don’t look like authentic Asians, with those oriental looks. And I like that mole of yours.
BOY: Okay babe, sure. Love is all about compromising, compromising and more compromising. I am sure everything will work out fine. We are on our way to having our own tiny little mollies happy family.
GIRL: Oh Molie baby, I am so glad you are so understanding. Since you have agreed to all my terms and conditions, I think everything is pretty much settled. For our convenience and the sake of good order, I have taken the liberty of asking my BFFs who Aced their biz law modules (and think that they are officially 1/64 trainee lawyers) to draft a nuptial contract.
Now we will both have a peace of mind, since everything we discussed today will be written down in black and white and will be legally binding. So if you violate any part of the contract, you owe me a duty of care, and hence emotional compensation. Babe, give me your thumb, I need your thumbprint here at this dotted line.
Now we will both have a peace of mind, since everything we discussed today will be written down in black and white and will be legally binding. So if you violate any part of the contract, you owe me a duty of care, and hence emotional compensation. Babe, give me your thumb, I need your thumbprint here at this dotted line.
BOY slips the ring into GIRL’s hand and changes her FB status to “blissfully engaged”.
BOY: let’s go down and view some potential love nest tomorrow.
GIRL: Erm. I am not free. I have got something on.
BOY: Ok, the day after next.
GIRL: I am not free either, I have to go jogging.
BOY: we’ll go after your jog.
GIRL: Not free.
BOY: okay babe, how about you name the day you are free.
GIRL: I think I will be not free until maybe 1st april 2013
BOY: but that’s like how many years later.
GIRL: Actually mollie baby, I think I changed my mind. I don’t want to eat bland food with you anymore. Here, you can have your cheapskate, plastic-looking ring back. It’s so light I can’t even feel it on my finger to tell the truth. Why don’t you propose to me some other day when you know I am in the mood? I swear I love you. I am not indecisive or totally insane.
BOY: yea sure, I have absolute faith in that fleeting love of yours. Hold on a sec, let me change my Facebook status to painfully single so that my brotherhood can console my wounded heart. Wow, I got engaged and dumped on the same day. And you tell me you’re not fickle-minded. See, that bridge over there, I am going there to do a bungee jump with no strings attached. Bye~~~
Came across my script...written in a fit of boredom. I bet the person who has been spoofed knows it's her. I swear nobody else knows it's you =P
